The New Horse That I Can’t Get

So here I am a couple of weeks after Ri’s death and still feeling pretty bummed (putting it very mildly). Right about now I would’ve started riding Ri around just for short jaunts in the pasture, beginning the process of bringing her back into condition after a long pregnancy.  And to make matters worse Lady is now randomly “thumping” during the day.  I don’t know what that means and I’m leery of asking the vet since I think he may be cursed (not really… just been a bad year and he admittedly doesn’t know much about thumps).  So she’s totally on pasture rest for the foreseeable future. 

So I find myself horseless.  I know, I know I have a bunch of horses but 2 are fully retired (Lady and Belle) 2 are emotionally damaged/rescues (Fantine and Beau) 1 isn’t exactly mine (Maddy) and the rest are babies (Bingley, Woodrow, Pip and Leo).  In a few years I’m going to have an INCREDIBLE stable of horses in Bingley, Woodrow and Pip (Maddy too!) but right now, today… I’m horseless.

I wasn’t exactly ready to start looking again when Julie sent me a link to Bullwinkle and I went to see him.  He was nice but had a few issues but I was considering him when we decided to actually send Sophie to a new therapy in G’ville and that pretty much trumped all horse buying… so I had to decline my option to him.

But that opened the door to start looking and look I most certainly did… only I didn’t find anything locally… which lead me back to VSH where I bought Ri.  I had sent Liz an email telling her about Ri and I think they were just as sad as I was/am… maybe more so because they had more time with her and really KNEW what a great horse she was.

I notoriously have a preference for mares but for the first time in a very long time we have more geldings than mares and I thought staying with geldings would probably be a good idea.  So I looked.  And found so many grand horses!  So I called Liz and we talked about options and the best horse for me (I’m tall and…um… not little) and my preference for a sane but not boring ride.  She offered up a few that I had looked at (mares and geldings alike) and then she stopped… paused… and then in a rush asked me to look at a particular gelding that I hadn’t looked at because of his price. 

I did.

And fell head over heels.

Oh he’s so perfect.  17.2hh (taller than Lady, shorter than Ri)… solid bay (no white) which oddly enough is one of my favorite colors bc I rarely see it… jumps… hacks out… hunts… Percheron/TB… under 10… craziness!

Totally in love.

Plus there was some negotiation to his price that brought him very nearly within “doable” range.

PERFECT!

And then reality hit.

Remember Sophie’s therapy?

Yeah. Seriously trumps a horse. 

Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on the viewpoint) horses are very much like air for me.  I don’t function well when I don’t ride.  Trust me.  I have 4 years worth of experience to tell you how unwell I am (mentally) when I don’t ride.  I’ve tried other interests which is why I spin, draw, cook and write… but those are not air to me… those are passing fancies… things I do well for a day or two but then drop for years. 

So I’m understandably really not in a happy place right now.  I cannot begrudge my daughter’s therapy (the first that we’ve ever found that actually seems to work… I’ll have a whole post on it soon) but I think it’s fair to say that the thought of being horseless (or riding-horseless) has me in a near panic.  My hope is that I can save my pennies and purchase him sometime next year… but I’m not holding my breath that she’ll have him there that long. 

Sigh.

But I can hope… and maybe even dream….

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